Self-compassion entails being warm and understanding toward ourselves when we suffer, fail, or feel inadequate, rather than ignoring our pain or flagellating ourselves with self-criticism. (Dr. Kristen Neff, 2019)
Self-compassion is about being self-aware and taking time for yourself when things are not going well rather than trying to ignore your pain or telling yourself to “just get on with it”. We all have things that we do not like about ourselves but we can be overly harsh in our criticism saying things to ourselves in our head that we would NEVER say to another person as they are too harsh.
We all need to take a little time and care to be nice to ourselves even when we are confronted with failure. None of us are perfect and we need to allow our faults and failings with the same compassion that we give to those that we love. We are human and need to learn to understand and accept that as humans we are fallible and that is okay.
There are three elements of self-compassion according to Dr. Kristen Neff world renowned author on the subject.
1. Self-kindness vs. Self-judgment
2. Common humanity vs. Isolation
3. Mindfulness vs. Over-identification